I think I realized it

when I was in kindergarten that I wasn’t exactly the same as everyone else. I viewed girls and guys the same, like I had a crush a girl, I had a crush on a guy. It didn’t make a difference to me. As long as I thought the person was amazing, you know, personality wise. And I just…

It didn’t hit me until the fifth grade that I was different when I was on the Internet and there was like a quiz. It was just random. It was–. I was going on some website and it was like a quiz. And it was like: What’s your sexuality? And I was like: Oh, yeah–. So me being a naïve fifth grader, I was like: Oh, yeah, let me go look at, check this out. I’ll take this quiz.

And I took it and it was like: Oh, you’re bisexual. And I was like: Oh. OK. And I remember telling this guy at my school, my elementary school. I was like: I think I’m bisexual because I like girls and guys. And it doesn’t matter to me. And he teased me. He spread rumors about me. He was just like: You like girls? Ha, you’re a lesbian. It was just like–. It blew up. It was really ridiculous. I thought–.

It was–. It–. I wasn’t–.

I never was ashamed of it. I was just–. I realized that sexuality isn’t something that you tell everybody because you can’t tell everybody because some people are too immature to understand it. And once I realized that, I–, my sexuality became something that wasn’t really spoken about. I never told anybody. My family doesn’t know. My brother doesn’t know. Not–. I think maybe ten of my friends know. It’s not something that I tell people. And definitely because I realized that now, in this generation, people view you differently if you don’t have the same sexuality, which is absolutely ridiculous. You know?

Because I think that it should be who you are who’s judged. Like your morals, your understanding of others. It shouldn’t be your sexuality. And that’s just ignorance to just shut someone out because of that just because of who they like, like the gender they like.

And when I got into high school, my sophomore year, which is right now, I started realizing that: Yeah. I should embrace my sexuality. It shouldn’t be something that needs to be hidden. So now if it’s like, someone really wants to know? Then I’ll tell them. And I won’t care. You know? I think it’s something I should be proud of. I don’t want to keep hiding it. And I’m really proud to say that I am bisexual.

And that when I do end up falling in love with someone, it’s going to be because of who they are and not their gender or anything that society tells me. And, yeah–. Thank you for listening to my story.