BBP STORIES: I’m going to talk about my brother

BBP STORIES: I’m going to talk about my brother

West High School

TRANSCRIPT

 

I’m going to talk about my brother

 

I’m going to talk about my brother, who is gay. When I was in—let’s see—I was, I guess maybe 18 or 19 when he came out. And at that point in my life, it was not a surprise to anybody. And it was something that I think I took with stride and that he was just, you know, it was to be expected, and it was totally normal, or whatever you want to say.

But, when I was maybe 12, 13, 14—he was seven years younger. So, when I was at that age—when I was 13 years old, 12 years old, 15 years old, trying to figure out what a man was or what masculinity was or how I was supposed to act—I definitely resented at that age that I had a brother who did not fit any of that.

And I think that it’s something that—I don’t think I was a particularly mean brother, but I did mean things. And looking back on that, I think one of the reasons that I was mean was because he was gay, or because I thought he might be gay, or because the way he was acting was something that was negative or that was portrayed in the media or portrayed, you know, or that me and my friends would rag on each other for. For, you know, dancing around in drag at the age of five. It was something that, if he did that and my friends came over from middle school, it was something that I was ashamed of, unfortunately, at the time.

And so, I think something that—Luckily, I’ve changed a lot and, and I now—through just growing up, and meeting new people, and, and reflecting on who I am—I realize that, that that’s not who I am anymore.

And I just think that there are millions of other boys in America who are going through the same thing, that are trying to define their masculinity or who they are by defining who other people—you know, who else is not a man. And that is at the expense, usually, of people that are not gender conforming. That are not meeting the standard of what a man is supposed to be like: that they play sports, that they are wearing a T-shirt and jeans, and those sort of things.

And, so, I think for the rest of my life, I will use, use that knowledge when I’m working with, with 12-year-olds, with 13-year-olds and teenagers in a high school. And I think about that. I think about what’s going through their head, consciously or subconsciously, because I, when I was 12, I wasn’t thinking my brother was gay, but subconsciously, I was maybe ashamed of it. And, so, that’s something that I think about and that I try to take into account when I’m working.

BBP STORIES: She was my new year’s kiss

BBP STORIES: She was my new year’s kiss

West High School

TRANSCRIPT

 

You know, last January, New Year’s Eve, I was talking to my friend, right? And she was like, “Hey. We should go hang out over New Year’s and, like, just chill, right?” You know, I kind of had a crush on this girl for a while, just a little bit.

And so, I went over to her house. We had a sleepover, right? We were, we’re talking, and I mentioned that I kind of liked her. And she was like, “Oh. I kind of like you, too.”

And we watched some like um—we were on Netflix. We went to the gay and lesbian section to watch like—we found this one musical about it, and so we watched that together for a while. And we’re just sort of hanging out and watching movies the whole night, and it was really nice. And um-, around midnight, you know, everyone’s always all like, oh, with the bae, you know, getting that New Year’s kiss. And I just could only—kept thinking to myself, “Wouldn’t that be a great thing. You know?” So, um—, I was all like, “Hey.” She’s like, “Yeah?” I’m like, “Can I kiss you for New Year’s?” And she said, “Sure.” So um—, She was my New Year’s kiss. And it was pretty nice.

She lives kind of far from me now cause I moved to The Cities, and she’s still like in the burbs. I’m not very good at long-distance relationships, but I really want to transfer to her high school. Not just because of her, but, you know, good education and stuff, things like that. But I think it would be really cute if we started dating.

I remember when we first met in seventh grade, I think. I was her first friend. She’d just moved to Minnesota. And it was, it was nice. And we just gradually got closer over the years. I don’t know if New Year’s is my very first kiss with her. I actually think after a really big summer concert that we go to called Warped Tour, I slept over at her house. And I think that was our very first kiss. But it wasn’t, like, a real one, if you know what I mean, like. The New Year’s kiss was just much more like, “We did this, this happened, and this is a huge thing for us.” And that’s sort of my New Year’s story with a chick that I like.